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Symphony Announces 'Super Senior' Discount as 80+ Crowd Rejoices, Naps

The Sun Valley Summer Symphony just announced an exciting new Perks Program designed to reward its most loyal patrons for simply not dying.

"I haven't been this excited since my granddaughter's 2nd wedding!" said symphony regular Ivel Burns. "If you'll please excuse me, I need to finish sending my bank account information to this poor Nigerian prince who contacted me on the internet machine."

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